How to Write About Your Pain

If you had to pin down one universal emotion that all humans experience, it’s pain.

To be human means to suffer. We suffer on a daily basis as we deal with the disappointments and frustrations of everyday life.

But we also suffer when we go through the occasional major trauma, such as the death of a loved one, losing a job, a major sickness, a divorce, or any other negative life event.

Sometimes, we hesitate to share our pain because we’re afraid to look weak. So we lock up our feelings in a box, set it on a shelf in the back of a dark closet, and try to forget about it.

This is not a healthy way to deal with grief. Instead, one of the best ways of working through your pain is to write about it. The Brazilian novelist Paulo Coelho said, “Tears are words that need to be written.”

So, how exactly should you write about your tears? Here are three ideas:

First, you can journal about them. Journaling is a time-tested method for working out your feelings and getting perspective on life’s disappointments.

Second, you can write non-fiction articles, books, or other types of material where you talk about your experiences directly. This is a helpful way to work through your feelings, with the added benefit of helping others, as well.

And third, you can channel your experiences into fiction. This is an indirect way of processing your pain, but it can also be the most powerful way. Why? Because you can say things through fiction you would never say in non-fiction. The way you’re saying them is through events, characters, and dialogue in your stories.

Whatever medium you choose, don’t be afraid of your feelings. Don’t stuff them in a box or lock them away. Writing about your pain can bring healing not only for you, but for your readers as well.

Today’s Challenge: Think about the three ways I described—journaling, non-fiction material, and fiction—and consider how you can write about it to benefit you and others.