We writers live in a world of “yesses.” We love to say yes to that podcast interview, that new idea, that speaking opportunity, or that client work.  

There’s a good reason we do this. We don’t want to waste opportunities to build relationships and reach new readers. But the problem is that every “yes” we speak is also a “no” to something else. We only have so much time on this earth and we have to defend it vigorously. 

But what if you took the opposite approach? What if everything was a “no” by default? 

How do you do this? How do you get to a place where you are able to say no to so many things, even very good things? 

The solution is to get clear on what you want to do. When you are clear on what you are saying yes to, the no’s become much easier. If something doesn’t help you achieve your goal, you simply say, “No.”

Of course, it’s not always that smooth and easy in real life, but it is a great principle to consider. 

As the marketing expert Jeff Walker said, “Every yes must be defended by a thousand no’s.”  

Where do you live? Do you live in the land of a thousand “yesses” or the land of a thousand “no’s”? 

Do you have a clear idea of what you are saying yes to? And if so, what are you going to say “no” to so that you can give every “yes” your best attention? 

The post The Land of a Thousand No’s appeared first on Daily Writer | Essential Habits for Impact & Influence.

One of the most famous episodes of Seinfeld is “The Contest.” In this episode, Jerry, Elaine, George, and Kramer compete to see who can demonstrate self-control the longest. The one who wins will be known as “master of their domain.”  

What are they refraining from? Well, you’ll just have to watch the episode for yourself… 

The concept of self-mastery is an important one for writers. We spend a lot of our time obsessing over external obstacles, such as frustrations with technology, agents or publishers not giving us a shot, not having enough time to write, interruptions from people, and a million other things. 

But those are all beside the point. If we don’t master ourselves, nothing else matters. Success in writing really just comes down to arranging your life to make writing and publishing a priority. At the end of the day, it’s nothing more and nothing less.  

For thousands of years, the greatest minds from all religions, cultures, and walks of life have emphasized the need for self-mastery. The great artist Leonardo da Vinci said, “One can have no smaller or greater mastery than mastery of oneself.” 

While attempting to spend all of our time worrying about forces that fight to control us from the outside, we will get much further if we focus on mastering what’s on the inside. 

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