If you’re alive and breathing, you have struggled with jealousy. It’s part of the human condition.

But for most writers, jealousy is more than an occasional struggle. It’s a daily battle that threatens our very souls. It’s nearly impossible for us to separate ourselves from our creative work. It’s part of who we are.

When we see other writers who we perceive as more successful, or who have something we want, it’s difficult not to feel jealous. The question foremost in our minds is, “Why do they have ______, and I don’t?” (Fill in the blank with success, fame, money, social media followers, downloads, a book contract, or a million other things.)

But this is the wrong question, and here’s why: It’s based on a destructive lie about success. The lie goes something like this: When someone else succeeds, it means I have failed.

When we see other people enjoying their fame, money, accolades, or other types of success, we interpret it as a reflection on ourselves. Why do they get to enjoy success? Am I not worthy of the same success? Why do they get to have something that I don’t?

This is called a “zero-sum game.” When one person wins, another person loses. A positive balance in someone’s ledger means a negative balance in mine.

But it’s a myth. We know it isn’t true on an intellectual level, but our creative egos are fragile. The result? We emotionally interpret their success as a judgment against our own perceived lack of success.

Don’t buy the lie. One writer’s success doesn’t have anything to do with yours. The two things are not related. In fact, you can use that person’s success to help yourself be more successful.

Daily Question: Who is another writer you feel jealous about? How does it make you feel to know their success is not related to yours?