No matter what type of books you write, your work always belongs in the history category. Not necessarily because you’re writing literal history, but because you’re making history.

What does this mean? It means that you have immense power to determine how people think, feel, and act. If you write fiction, your stories can move people to fear, anger, tears, or joy. Those emotions can change how they feel about themselves, their family and friends, and their place in the world. Those feelings can lead to action.

If you write nonfiction, your words and content can educate, inform, inspire, and motivate people. The whole purpose of nonfiction is to help people make some kind of change in their lives. Maybe that change is learning more about the past, learning how to cook, breaking an addiction, or healing their marriage.

You’re making history with your words because you’re changing people. Quite literally, whenever you write and someone reads those words, it changes them and can move them to action.

When we writers describe what we do, we often put the modifier “just” in front of our title, as in “I’m just a writer.”

Winston Churchill said, “History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.” We can take that a step further. You’re never just a writer. You’re the most powerful type of person: one who may not necessarily be writing about history, but you’re definitely making it.

Question: As a writer, how do you feel you’re making history? Why or why not?

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We’ve talked about several steps in the Writer’s Path, and today we’ll focus on Milestone #5: Expanding your networking of friends, fans, and connections.

Why it’s important: One of the biggest things that holds back great writers is not knowing how to network and build relationships. I have learned a lot from Vincent Pugliese in this regard. He leads the Total Life Freedom community and mastermind, and he’s recently released a fantastic book called The Wealth of Connection, which I highly recommend. It will help you develop a mindset of networking and building relationships.

A network is critical because these are the people who will support your work, share your work, refer others to you and vice-versa. Whether it’s friends, fans, readers, collaborators, or connections, you need other people in your life and business to do anything significant.

The challenge here is that it’s hard for many introverted writers to do networking. We’ll have a lot more to say about this later on, but for now, I want to challenge you to simply reach out to three people a day just to say hello and see how they’re doing. People love it when others check up on them.

Remember, our greatest emotional need as human beings is for others to affirm and acknowledge us. When you can get past your introverted nature and begin to strategically reach out to people and build your connections, amazing things can happen.

This is one of the main things that holds writers back. You can be the greatest writer in the world, but if you don’t have connections and a network, you’re basically dead in the water. Your relationships are the difference-maker.

The big challenge here, especially for introverted writers, is that we mistakenly believe that writing success is all about being a good writer, about creating the most innovative or well-written content or books. Not true. We have to get out of our comfort zones and take initiative to build and nurture those relationships.

Daily Question: Who are three people you can check in on today?

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This episode is for all the writers who struggle to be outgoing.

I get it—most of us writers are introverts. We get our energy by spending time alone rather than spending it with people. But the reality is that people need to be a huge part of our lives as writers. After all, we’re not writing just for OURSELVES… we’re also writing for other people.

There is also the side of writing that has nothing to do with the writing part. It’s going to conferences, sending emails, being active on social media, going to meetups or masterminds, being active in your community, building good working relationships with editors and publishers, and so much more.

It turns out that a big part of being a successful writer has nothing to do with the writing itself.

There was once a time when you could get by with being a hermit or a curmudgeon as a writer. In the years before social media, if you were lucky enough to have a publishing deal, you would basically write and the publisher would do everything else. But that’s not the case anymore. The bottom line is that you have to relate to people. You have to be friendly and engaging.

Friendliness and being a warm relational human being is a choice. It’s not a personality trait. There is nothing good or positive about being a curmudgeon. Zip. Zero. Nada. It doesn’t serve you in any way.

So, if you struggle with this aspect of your writing life, just know you can build a habit of warmth and friendliness. You can make the choice to smile and be pleasant. It’s a habit you can build just like any other.

Daily Question: What can you do today in your interactions with others to show friendliness and warmth?

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Remember the 1980’s movie “Field of Dreams” with Kevin Costner? He plays a farmer who is roaming out in his field one day, and he hears a voice. “Build it and he will come.” He has no idea what the voice means until he starts taking action and listening to the subsequent messages the voice gives him.

The idea of “build it and they will come” makes for a compelling movie, but it’s not true in the real world. People don’t show up just because you build something. Rather, people show up when they are interested or when they will receive something helpful or entertaining.

Remember, marketing is all about people. Many writers think that marketing is a curse word. They just want to write. They just want to create. But people won’t show up and be interested just because you’ve written something. You need to promote. You need to get onto podcasts as a guest. You need to be active on social media. You need to get out and interact with real people at events, conferences, workshops, having coffee with friends, and more.

Marketing is not a dirty word at all. Marketing is simply telling people when you’re excited about something. If you believe what you’re writing is helping people, marketing is the most loving and helpful thing you can do for others.

Daily Question: What are three things you can do this week to market your work and get the word out about your writing?

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There are many advantages to being an introverted writer. You enjoy being alone, which is a big benefit when trying to get your writing done. You’d mostly rather spend your time with books than with people, which can help you dive deeply into literature and learning. You’d rather observe than participate, which can help you approach life like a journalist or researcher.

Those same tendencies can backfire sometimes, though. The very strengths that help you become a great writer can make it hard for you to build an audience—which is something every writer must do.

Here are five quick tips for introverted writers on building an audience.

1. Don’t be afraid to put yourself and your writing out there. Life is not all about observing others or writing about other people’s experiences. We want to hear what YOU have experienced and what YOU have to say about your topic.
2. Remember, writing is all about serving people. Don’t get hung up on what you think others think about you. Keep in the forefront of your mind the idea that your writing is helping people.
3. Get out and have real conversations with people. As introverts, we often live in our heads and avoid life in the real world. But this is where the action happens. Don’t think of people as “exhausting”—think of them as your best teachers and the reason you do what you do.
4. Test out material by blogging, podcasting, guest posting, and writing for other websites. The only way to get better is to write consistently. Don’t worry about trying to build a perfect system. Just start writing, test out material in as many places as you can, and then get better by learning from these experiences.
5. Don’t over-analyze this process. Just start writing and course-correct as you go. You have to let go of the need to be perfect and to have it all figured out. Just relax, get to work, and know that you are intelligent and will figure it out as you go along.

Your greatest strength can also be your greatest weakness. Don’t get sucked into the lie that people are the enemy. You’re there to serve them, enjoy them, and learn from them.

Daily Question: Which of these 5 tips do you need to put into practice the most?

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Let’s talk about one of the more uncomfortable truths of the author life. It has nothing to do with books, but it has everything to do with how others perceive you. And therefore, that means it has everything to do with your social standing and how much others want to be around you.

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: people judge you by the company you keep. If you spend time with positive, successful, generous people, you will be perceived the same way. You will borrow their influence and others will want to be around you because other people’s goodwill and positivity will be transferred to you. Of course, you can destroy this borrowed goodwill by being a jerk, but if you keep good company, it will greatly help your success.

The opposite is also true. If you spend time with negative people who complain, aren’t growing, and tear others down, you will be perceived the same way as well. You can do lots of good things yourself, but we are judged by the company we keep. As they say, bad company corrupts good character.

This may not be fair, but it’s the way that social relationships work. We are always looking for ways to gauge whether someone is a potential threat, and one of the ways we do this is by seeing who they spend time with. One of the fastest shortcuts to success is by spending time with people who others like to be around. As a result, they will also be open to spending time with you and giving you opportunities. This can greatly help your writing and business opportunities.

Daily Question: Take a good look at the people you spend the most time with. Are they helping to improve your reputation and social standing?

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When you begin studying the lives of the great writers, one of the most surprising things you’ll learn is how well aware most of them were regarding their limitations and the role that luck played in their success.

For example, Ernest Hemingway once said, “I have tried simply to write the best I can; sometimes I have good luck and write better than I can.” We don’t think of Ernest Hemingway as a writer who needed any sort of luck. We think of him as immensely gifted and one of the 20^th century’s most important writers.

But the truth is that luck plays a role in every writer’s career… including yours. That’s why you can forge ahead with confidence. Sure, we all need to work on our skills and craft. There’s a place for that. However, getting around the right people is also a critical part of your success. And sometimes, we just get a stroke of luck and happen to write something that jives with the public’s consciousness at just the right time.

The best part, though, is that you have a large measure of control over how much “luck” comes your way. Spend time around the right people, work on your craft, be persistent, and don’t take yourself too seriously. Then you’ll just happen to get lucky a lot more often.

Daily Question: What are the habits or practices that help you become more “lucky” in your writing success?

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Have you ever sat in a coffee shop and listened to the conversations happening around you? It’s fascinating.

99% of the time, people are only talking about themselves. Almost everyone in every social situation makes a conversation about them. It is rare to hear someone who is listening empathetically to the other person who is speaking.

It is so rare to listen empathetically because it is so hard to do. It is hard to put our own ego and agenda aside and listen with our full attention to what someone else is saying. To not only listen to the words, but also the emotion and the intent behind it.

In fact, communication experts have told us for decades that there’s far more communication happening in the facial gestures and body language of people than there is in their words. To go even a step further, our words are sometimes even designed to hide what we are really thinking and feeling.

That is why critical listening is so important. It is not only a key part of relating with people, it is also a way for us to learn about human nature. When we listen, it gives us ideas for our writing, whether fiction or nonfiction, and it helps us to better understand other people and ourselves. What could possibly be more important for us as writers than understanding people?

So the next time you’re sitting in a coffee shop or somewhere else where there are conversations happening all around you, listen and learn. Observe the people who are only talking about themselves, but also try to listen for those who are truly paying attention to other people.

It is an interesting social experiment. But it can also help you become a better listener yourself, a skill that pays huge dividends no matter what type of writing you do.

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Here at the Daily Writer, we talk a lot about the habit of writing regularly. That’s nothing new. Every good writing teacher talks about the importance of a good writing habit.

Another habit that is equally important, yet for some reason emphasized much less, is the publishing habit. If you want to impact other people with your words, you must not only write them… you must also publish them.

I don’t necessarily mean publishing every single thing you write. That’s not realistic. For example, I don’t publish anything from my personal journal. But, if you write something you intend for other people to read, you should edit it, and then publish it.

This may seem like a silly thing to mention. After all, why would someone write a blog post, podcast content, or even a whole book… and yet never publish it? The answer is that we get scared of what others will think. We believe it’s not good enough. We wonder if we have any talent to begin with.

I confess that I have done this. In fact, there are at least two full-length books I wrote a few years ago that have never seen the light of day. So, I’m working through that material now to try and figure out the best strategy for publishing it or re-working it.

This is more common than you think. There are many people who have written screenplays, books, speeches, and other material that they simply didn’t publish. They ran out of steam and just gave up. It’s easy to do.

So, this is my challenge to take what you have written and publish it somewhere so that it can help others. You’ve heard that saying, “If a tree falls in the forest, does it make a sound?” Here’s a related saying: “If you write a book but never publish it, does it impact anyone’s life?”

Yes, there is some value in going through the exercise of writing. There is always value in writing, no matter what it is. But imagine how much more valuable your words can be if you publish them, if you give those words an opportunity to inspire, educate, or entertain others.

The post The Publishing Habit appeared first on Daily Writer | Essential Habits for Impact & Influence.

Nobody intends to kill their big dream. 

After all, our dreams are what keep us going. We think about them day and night, we plan our future around them, we nurture them with books, movies, and other content that keep the dream alive. 

But inevitably, sometimes we kill the dream. How does this happen? The comedian and game show host Steve Harvey tells us how. He said, “If you want to kill a big dream, tell it to a small-minded person.” 

In our excitement, we sometimes share our dream with people who don’t want to hear it. If you want to be a bestselling author, and you tell your dream to someone who doesn’t think it’s possible, they will wound your dream. 

They will say you shouldn’t have those ridiculous notions in your head. They will say your plans won’t work. They will say you should be realistic.   

Pretty soon, if you tell enough of these people about your dream, it will die a slow death.  

So, reserve your dream for people who support you. Those people will not only listen to your dream, they will also help you achieve it. Your dream is a living, breathing thing, and it must be nurtured and cared for by people who want to see it grow. 

And when those small-minded people ask what you’re working on, you can just be vague or only share a bit of your dream with them. They’re not bad people… it’s just that their dreams have already died, and they don’t have the ability to help yours grow. 

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